Blue Christmas

Blue Christmas

Dear Joy, The holidays are a sad time for me, my husband died two years ago and my kids are grown and don’t need me anymore and I am alone and everything about Christmas reminds me of what I don’t have any more. I know I should feel grateful being in Vallarta instead of freezing in New York, but I just feel sad and lonely and as if my life is over. How do I get through these holidays?

signed: Blue Christmas

Dear Blue Christmas, that part of your life is over. The next part is beginning. It sounds like you had many years with a wonderful family, and a two year opportunity to grieve the ending of that cycle. That’s a strong foundation from which to build whatever you choose to create next.

Your kids don’t need you any more, which opens the way for other things and people who do; perhaps it’s time to seek them out.

To get you over the holiday hump, I invite you to put all of your Christmas holiday memories in a beautiful box to treasure always, and with that done turn your attention to experiencing an entirely new kind of Christmas. Vallarta is a good place to do that.

Dive deep into the culture here, research as if for a project, what a Mexican Christmas and New Year is like. Mexicans are magnificent in their generosity, if you show interest in them and their lifestyle, they will welcome you with wide open hearts.

Buy a big book in which to write down your findings, take photos, draw pictures, and record your experiences in this book.

Explore the different foods and ways this time of year is celebrated here. Go to a service at the Church of Guadalupe and observe the faces of the parishioners. Get yourself invited to some Mexican posadas and parties by showing up with an open heart, a big grin, and perhaps a bottle of tequila, or a plate of food. Yes you really can crash the parties, consider it part of the project.

Visit the children at the dump, and the kids at R.I.S.E. See what Christmas is like for them.

There are 12 days of Christmas to explore. Pay particular attention to January 6th, the Day of the Kings.

Don’t do this as a cursory thing, go deep into this project, place your entire focus upon it, let yourself be truly fascinated, because once you begin you’ll see how fascinating it is. Perhaps you could even report some of your findings to the PV Mirror, I know I’d be interested in reading about your discoveries, I’m sure I wouldn’t be the only one. Let us know how you go.